Almost Human - Chapter 19: The Scorpion and Bat

Bruce awoke as soon as the sun was about to rise, he was honestly a bit at ease with everything that had happen between him and the Joker, which was a surprise because he thought that he would be in a panic after having sex with his greatest enemy. He felt relaxed as if last night reset his frenzied and hectic mind. Bruce immediately noticed that the Joker was lying beside him. Before he could investigate the bedroom door opened and the pale clown came in half dressed in his pinstriped purple pants and his hair slightly wet as if he just showered.

"Did I wake you sweetheart? I thought I'd let my Batsy sleep in," he smiled as he continued to dry his hair with a towel.

"What time is it?"

"About seven, you seemed very tired so I let you sleep, did you have somewhere to be or something?"

"No it's just… I shouldn't be here," Bruce responded a bit nerved at how casually he was conversing with the man who was supposed to be his enemy. He got out of bed and began to retrieve his clothing. He found his pants but seemed to have difficulty finding his shirt. Bruce was caught off guard when the Joker handed it to him.

"You sure you don't want to stay and shower up or maybe get some breakfast?"

"I'm fine!" snapped the vigilante as he snatched his shirt from the clown. Joker merely stood silent at the hero's sudden burst of anger, which made Bruce feel a pang of guilt. Bruce dressed himself in silence putting on his boots, cape and armor. The Joker took this time to put on a fancy yellow dress shirt and start buttoning it. Just before Bruce was about to don the cowl he paused to look over at the Joker who was combing his hair by the mirror over the dresser.

"Why are you being so nice to me?"

"Oh darling, how many times must I repeat myself?" responded the Joker with a slightly annoyed expression.

"Alright fair enough, answer this though, what's going to happen when I leave here? Are we just going back to the way we were before?"

"Good question," the madman mused. He paused for a moment and began to chuckle softly to himself. "I think you already know the answer to that Bat-love."

"That's the part I don't understand. You say you love me though you do things that I despise and intentionally hurt me. Why!?" questioned Bruce as he gripped the cowl in a tight fist.

Joker could tell that his bat was confused and angry. Maybe he did not get what he was trying to say entirely, just bits and pieces. It was more than anyone, that's why his Batman understood him more than anyone else. "Have you ever heard of a story called "The Scorpion and the Bat"?"

"Joker I'm not playing around…"

"Just sit down and listen, you'll get your answer," smiled the clown as he guided the bat to sit on the bed.

"There once was a scorpion drowning in a river. A bat comes flying along and swoops down and saves the scorpion. Just as the bat carries him out of the rushing and deadly waters of the river, the scorpion stings the bat!" cackled the Joker as he told his story with great enthusiasm and hand gestures to illustrate his point. "The bat screams in terrible agony, "Why!? I tried to save you, now we'll both die!" To which the scorpion replies, "It's my nature."

"Wait wasn't it a scorpion and a frog? You completely made up that up," interjected the knight.

"I do as I please but that's not the point. The point is I can't change who I am just as much as you can't change who you are Bruce."

"Then what was that talk about feeling and not wanting to be seen as a monster!?"

The Joker sighed heavily and stood up to go to his closet to pick out a black ribbon to tie around his neck. "I meant that I didn't want you to look at me like how all those pathetic people in this blasted city look at me. But I honestly didn't intend for you to keep psychoanalyzing me every god damn time we talk. They see us how their little minds comprehend from what they see in the media. Whether it's flip flopping with you as the hero then to a menace or how they see nothing but a monster when they hear the name Joker. You know better though, you know despite the murder and madness that I'm still just a man. I bleed, I hurt, I break, hell all that stuff you've done to me with your fists," laughed the pale man as he stopped fumbling with his ribbon, went to Bruce and held his gloved hand.

"I just wanted you to see even a glimpse that there's more to me, more to how I feel about you Batman."

Bruce didn't know how to respond to that, so he latched on to the first idea that came to mind. "What about Harley?"

Joker's expression fell flat. "Seriously, you bring her up now. Hell Batso you sure didn't mention her last night when we were having sex." Bruce could feel his face burn for that dumb question, but the Joker drew another deep breath and smiled. "Look there might be a little part of me that feels for the gal, I mean I did break her and create her into my own image, my perfect girlfriend/punching bag. You don't see me asking about the cat dame do you? That's probably why I feel more towards you than Harley. I didn't create you, you were already there and try as I might I still haven't broken you. We aren't permanent but I see us doing this dance forever, Batman is an ideal he'll go on with whatever one of your birdies picks up the cowl." Joker's smile widened as he looked to the mask in Bruce's grasp. "As for me well who knows how I'll go on. Maybe Harley might get pregnant with my kid or maybe after I'm gone a group of delinquents take the name Joker and form a gang or something like that. The point is sweetheart as much as you want to deny it you feel something for me too and try as you might you can't get rid of me. So enjoy the dance while you still can."

When his knight said nothing back the Joker merely sighed and went back to the dresser mirror to try to tie the ribbon. He fumbled with it; he usually has Harley do this for him. Bruce finally put on his cowl and went over to the struggling clown prince. Silently he gestured to the criminal to let him do it. The Joker smiled when the black ribbon was done into a simple bow. "I knew you had a soft spot for clowns." Joker dared to wrap his arms around his bat; Batman let him and was embracing him too.

"Don't expect me to hold back just because of what has happened between us," said Batman in a low voice.

Joker looked into his eyes and smiled, "wouldn't have it any other way Batsy." The Joker giggled as he let go of the hero. "You know if you're set on following this lead you have on the asylum then I suggest you go visit Doc Leland. She seems to be the only one there that's on your side. If you go right now and sneak into her office she should be there. I'm sure she'd be happy to help you."

Batman walked out of the room but before he left fully he turned to face the clown one last time. "Thank you," he replied quietly as he took his leave.

Gotham's infamous criminal had a genuine smile spread across his red lips. He turned to look at the lone teddy bear lying on his bed. The blue buttons shimmered brightly in the morning light; they reminded him of his bat's striking eyes. "Well what do ya know little Brucey, that's what I call progress."